he took his own life. his death devastated so many and yet there is a miracle in his passing. i felt love like i have never felt the day he died. his body was cold and the cover of fog surrounded my yard, full of his people, my people, us. we were all together, grounded and howling in grief. grief takes all forms and we can pass all the judgement we want, but the most important thing to remember is to honor and respect the memory of love shared. i think that is why it is so fucking painful. because leif was able to share love with you in a way that made you feel like you were the only person on his mind. he created friendship out of pure curiosity. his heart was one of the most generous and alive that i have ever met.
i miss him every day. i hate myself because i didn't help him in his sadness. but i am thankful that in his death we found love and friendship that we will never let go of. i love you leif!
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